She didn’t answer your calls two years ago and hasn’t reached out since, but what the hell, give it another whirl, you chump. One more time won’t hurt. You could write another love letter—email, in your case—like you did when she first bailed on you, you desperate sap, or be bold and do something different. It’s not like the email did you any good back then.
Here’s what you do. Snap a picture of one of those books you guys talked about in bed. You know, the horror writer you both said was your favorite author? What was the one you told her you hadn’t yet read, and she couldn’t believe it? That’s the one. Take a picture of the cover. Pull up her number. Attach the photo. Type underneath it: “Look what I’m finally getting around to reading!”
Doesn’t matter that you’re not reading it, you pathetic shit. She won’t know the difference. This is just to get her attention.
You’re all set. Photo attached. Check your spelling. Good to go. Now send it, loser.
Message Not Delivered.
The hell’s that mean?