Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you give him mercury poisoning.

A bird in the hand is cheaper than two in Bushwick.

A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know will cover what they have clear-cut.

As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his homebrew kit.

The road to hell is paved with student loans.

From trivial things, great tweets often arise.

Give them an inch and switch to the metric system.

You can lead a horse to water but you can’t guarantee the pipes aren’t lead.

He who loses money, loses much; She who loses money, loses a quarter less of what she’s worked twice as hard to attain.

Better the devil you know than the devil that is glowing orange.