Courtney LeBlanc is the author of the chapbook All in the Family (Bottlecap Press) and is an MFA candidate at Queens University of Charlotte. Her poetry is published or forthcoming in Public Pool, Rising Phoenix Review, The Legendary, Germ Magazine, Quail Bell Magazine, Brain Mill Press, Haunted Waters Press, and others. She loves nail polish, wine, and tattoos. Read her blog at www.wordperv.com, follow her on twitter: www.twitter.com/wordperv, or find her on facebook:www.facebook.com/poetry.CourtneyLeBlanc.
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LIST AND DESCRIBE ANY LAKES YOU’VE BECOME FRIENDS WITH
Lake Sherando in Virginia is a great place to camp though I’ve never actually been in the water so really, does this make us friends? Probably not.
DO YOU FLOSS?
I literally cannot go to bed without flossing and brushing my teeth.
TELL A STORY ABOUT SCARY OATMEAL
Once when flying first class (I get upgraded a lot, I travel extensively for work and fly 100,000 miles a year) they served oatmeal as the breakfast. That would have been fine but they topped it with coconut which is the devil so I had to perform an exorcism before I could eat it which was pretty scary at 30,000 feet.
UMBRELLAS ARE FUN TO SELECT AND PURCHASE?
No.
ARE YOU A PINBALL WIZARD?
No.
EVER ASK TO BORROW A PENCIL IN MATH CLASS JUST TO START A CONVERSATION WITH SOMEONE?
If I was smarter I would have but only if I could copy off their test since math isn’t my strong suit.
FAVORITE FILM FROM THE 1980’S?
Breakfast Club
EVER RIDE A BICYCLE BUILT FOR TWO??
No because I’m not part of an obnoxious couple who has to do everything together.
MEOW OR WOOF? I MEAN, WHICH SOUND WOULD YOU PREFER TO MAKE ALL DAY?
While dogs are clearly superior I think what they’re saying when they bark is simply “HEY!” As in “Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!” Cats, on the other hand, are dignified assholes who only speak when they actually want something so if I’m forced to mimic one all day I guess it’ll have to be a cat. (I say this begrudgingly.)
JUMP ROPE OR POGO STICK?
Jump rope. Can anyone actually stay on a pogo stick for more than 1.5 frantic hops?
LICORICE OR ROCK CANDY?
Neither, you can keep that nasty stuff. Gimme a piece of chocolate instead.
SAND OR LEAVES? I MEAN, WHICH WOULD YOU RATHER WALK ON BAREFOOT?
Sand. Seriously, does anyone pick leaves? What weirdos.
EVER HAVE A FAVORITE DINER WHERE YOU CHUCKLE WITH BUDDIES AND ASK FOR “THE USUAL?”
No, though the famous Bob & Edith’s is just across the street from my house. I’ve only been there once, about 10 years ago. A date took me there after a concert; we had coffee and talked for a couple of hours. Much to his chagrin this didn’t seduce me and I didn’t invite him home with me.
BEST KIND OF PANCAKES
The kind that are actually quiche.
INVENT A NEW GAME TO PLAY ON A RAINY DAY
Reading poetry can be a game, right?
FAVORITE OFFICE SUPPLIES TYPE OF ITEM?
Post-it notes. So many colors and sizes!
ARE COUGH DROPS DELICIOUS?
Decidely not.
DO YOU KNOW HOW TO MAKE BALLOON ANIMALS? COULD A HUMAN BEING EVER DEVELOP A MEANINGFUL ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP WITH A BALLOON ANIMAL?
I can make a snake. Or a worm. Neither of these takes any talent and I don’t think they have the kind of sparkling personality that would attract a romantic partner.
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questions by Kyle Flak
answers by Courtney LeBlanc