The presale is now live.
For $0 you can watch me
slowly replace meals with a can of tuna
and instant mashed potatoes.
Fruit to fight off scurvy
like anyone drowning
at a 9-5 plans for.
Perform competence at work,
more stilted
than an abandoned Chuck E. Cheese animatronic
and just as likely to text back.
Someone tells me they googled my obituary,
livid
after the fifth unanswered text.
Don’t you care about my feelings?
As if I had energy to spare
for more than an in breath.
For $0, ticket protection included.
No additional friendship admin services.
Shows play multiple times per year.