not literally, of course
every asshole i have eaten
has been boneless
but through the magic of song
i have conjured the brundle pod
and i am brundlezevon,
soft baby fat melting from my face
to reveal a guy who also
basically has a baby face
but keeps singing “lawyers, guns and money”
unprompted at parties.
if i am what i eat
and rob gordon considered
we are what we listen to
then i am warren zevon
because i killed and ate warren zevon
i am mesothelioma
because i listen to cancer
i am afraid of intimacy
because i eat a lot of chicken
(or maybe it’s the other thing)
most of which is boneless
i am boneless
below the influence or
like martin short in that one film,
sliding down the stairs
singing “send lawyers, guns and money”
“someone get me out of this”
Ha!