My Skeleton Wants Out

David HensonApril 18, 2024

It would like nothing more than to shed, pirouette and moonwalk away to its own music, leaving me behind like a deflated pool dragon. My skeleton’s drumbeat ...

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Ted’s funeral is held at McDonald’s

Cheryl MarkoskyMarch 18, 2024

Frank deep-fat cremates him and scatters his ashes along with fries in the park. McNugget Buddies forever, Dipstick Kid and Layabout Louis pay their respects...

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Stuff

Matthew CiazzaMarch 8, 2024

I’m holding crystal light water enhancers because I know you love them and I figure you’re dehydrated. I need help. It’s been a while since I’ve seen you. My tw...

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Dealing with My Existential Crisis After My Spec Script “Kevin McClane: Die Home Alone Hard” is Rejected for the Twentieth Time

Sean SchulzFebruary 29, 2024

I know many people believe they are, but I actually am, a genius, and its hard to describe the pain I feel from not having that recognized. In my Script Writing...

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VIDEO, BLOODY, INN

Elijah SparkmanFebruary 28, 2024

Once upon a time there was a dog named Hunter. He had a disease on his nose. Nobody really cared. He was in a band called The Bloody Videos. They played every o...

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UNICORN MAN

Rick ClaypoolFebruary 22, 2024

My tick repellant stopped working so now I’m covered in ticks. I tried going to the store for more tick repellant but I didn’t make it. Going to the store...

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Lucy the Elephant Wins in a Landslide

John ArthurFebruary 2, 2024

We are proud of our tree-lined streets. They provide us with shade. We stand in the shade to avoid the sun. The sun gives us life but too much will kill us. Eve...

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#sohumble

Eliot S. KuJanuary 29, 2024

Another year around the sun1. Wow2. This past year saw a lot of ups and downs3. I learned to accept my flaws4 and love myself in spite of them5. I also learned ...

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Alien Interventions and Paranoias

Brooks C. MendellJanuary 10, 2024

“Mom just texted me,” said Katina. “Yes?” I said, hearing my wife flush the toilet upstairs. “Daniel isn’t starting on his Little League team, so she’s co...

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Jason has one month to save the Earth

Bridget DalyDecember 8, 2023

Jason wished he’d consulted Google Maps before setting out on his journey to the end of the world, with the sun in his wheelbarrow. The deal was that he had to ...

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If everyone just starts eating we can probably eat the whole earth in a week.

Sasha BrownDecember 7, 2023

Find out what’s really down there. I’m suspicious. Don’t trust anything where people are like don’t eat that, it’s gonna be lava. I don’t think lava is a thing....

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Notes From an Unreliable Narrator

William M. McIntoshDecember 1, 2023

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been in this suit, this overcoat of what you see, this visage of who you think I am. It slips sometimes and snags on things,...

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Barbie Dream

Tonya RileyNovember 29, 2023

In my Barbie dreams, the doors open for me right away, the hands of dozens of Kens balancing the heavy metal and glass on their pinky fingers. The other fingers...

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I went in my therapist’s office and she was dead!

Tyler DempseyNovember 27, 2023

A note on the desk said: How does that make you feel? Terrible! I ran! The reception area was a giant billboard. It read: We'll bill your card on file. The...

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To the Kid We Pelted with Six Dozen Eggs on Halloween Night, 1996

Eric AldrichNovember 27, 2023

You, kid who we pelted with six dozen eggs, may hate the memory of two carloads of punks egging you on Halloween night in 1996, but understand we had no choice....

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Saint Petersburg Girls

Ryan GriffithNovember 20, 2023

There are many Petersburgs, each of them black and tasting of stone. The city sprawls in a tangled nervous system, twisted districts and zones crisscrossed by c...

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Cowboys & Aliens

Will MusgroveNovember 8, 2023

The humidity of summer vacation filled our lungs like water balloons, so my friends and I decided to cool off with a flick, Cowboys & Aliens. When the credi...

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Eclipse

Catherine RobertsNovember 7, 2023

You’ve been waiting all week for this.   You dab a moon of melted glitter on your cheekbone, another to match on the other. There’s vodka in the mug ...

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X Marks the (Bathroom) Spot

Kat MeadsNovember 1, 2023

Marcus locked the bathroom door—or tried to. It was an old and wobbly lock that failed to properly catch, which was really, really not helping since he definite...

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Changsha Horror Story

Eliot S. KuOctober 16, 2023

I found a decent looking hole in the wall restaurant near the wide and beautiful Xiang River that bisects the city. I had just reconnected with long-lost cousin...

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Bloodletting

Amy DeBellisOctober 4, 2023

When a pair of ski-masked men walk into the country hospital, guns drawn and saying Do what we say and you won’t get hurt, nobody knows how to react at first. P...

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I’ve been speaking with Joan of Arc on the Ouija Board

Caleb BetheaOctober 2, 2023

We’re writing ghost stories together. It’s autofiction. We’re BFFs. Mostly started as YESNOGOODBYE but now she calls me bitch and we laugh until I weep into my ...

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Legendary Rapper Redman Puts His Staten Island Crib on the Market

John Waddy BullionOctober 1, 2023

I don’t think it really hit home that I was moving out for good until the man came to fix my doorbell. This guy was a magician; he was on some real David Blaine...

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Getting to Know You

Brian SaccaSeptember 17, 2023

  “Hi, Glenda! I’m David. It’s so lovely to meet in person. It’s weird to only communicate over texting, right? I don’t feel like I know someone until I...

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Terms and Conditions

Lucas HubbardSeptember 8, 2023

I can help. I’ve made nine thousand, just in America today, Marcus. I know you’ve been shopping together for a decade. The wedding was overdue, based on how ...

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Puff

Matt LeibelSeptember 4, 2023

A cloud went to a party. The cloud didn’t know anyone, so it just hovered awkwardly and nibbled puff pastries in the living room. A guy came up and introduced h...

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Course Description

Chris EbelAugust 29, 2023

History 411: Human Fallibility   Students in this course will investigate how humans’ inherent fallibility has denied our species from fully achievin...

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One-Star Google Maps Review of a Rhode Island Lighthouse

Chas CareyAugust 28, 2023

What did it do to deserve this? There’s no explanation. Just the star itself, unadorned, accusatory, the sole record of any visitor’s presence. Did the reviewer...

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To reach into the earth and eat it: a guide

Gretta TrafficanteAugust 21, 2023

First, you must have tried other food and been unfulfilled. If you’re looking to move quickly, an unseasoned casserole will do, or slightly burnt toast, in a pi...

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Mixed Media

Emily HooverAugust 20, 2023

I drive to Riverside City College to give Dr. Lamoreaux my Life Drawing I portfolio. I imagine her sitting in her office, the citron light shining on her face j...

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