Fatty Carbonara (he wasn’t fat, that just happened to be his name) stepped out of the shower bright and early one morning to find a little heap of dark green le...
Nine days before they uncovered the bodies, I watched Silvia Esposito perform her family’s late August ritual. In a one-piece Wonder Woman swimsuit, she stompe...
Poor boarding school boy Gil Freeman awakes after a long horrible night spent in a tired and dreary Scottish hospital. He is alone in the desolation of the mind...
I’m in the kitchen. Swanson is locked in the cellar. He can’t be trusted. He cries fake tears and tells me his wife and kid must be worried sick. A wreck, he sa...
For some reason, I felt better after a beer for breakfast. Bacon helped. Eggs, too. What didn’t was the seven-foot-tall AI nightmare glaring at me from the corn...
St. Peter will look a little like your seventh-grade biology teacher, the one who had a green parrotlet he kept as a pet, which would cuddle up in his long gray...
I feel the nail start to give and I edge my front tooth in further. I press down and hear the clip. Shit, a pain shoots through my cuticle. I went too far. It's...
I love corporations. When I play video games, I imagine my character as a badass CEO. He’s wearing a suit, mowing down enemies without remorse, sweating from hi...
The last thing the anesthesiologist said to me was "Did you watch the newest season of White Lotus?"
I was fast asleep before I could tell her that Shane fro...
i. They call me Gruesome, and I goad them on.
“Yes,” I say.
“Fantastic,” I say.
“Call me Mister Gruesome.”
Have you seen me? It was an ad they had m...
“You really don’t think so?”
Bit of an attitude, as I asked this, managing only a polite glance at the capuchins all twitchy and jumpy behind the glass, scra...
I wake up to the sound of my phone having a seizure on the nightstand.
Notifications. DMs. Three different apps telling me it is time to check in with my fee...
“You will never speak the language of music.”
You said that to me once, while strumming your guitar. How pretentious I thought. How rude. Even in my early 20...
My father loves me very much.
I want to start with that because it’s the most important thing in the story. We live in a cynical world, where people take you...
A woman at the passage between subway cars held the door open and screamed into the void. The rest of us kept our eyes to ourselves, acutely aware of her every ...
Sterile room, fluorescent lights, it’s freezing too. Agent Fields across the table, a face you wanna punch. Tell me about Zahid, he says.
We met on Lan Kwai ...
On break, fucking finally.
Light another one of god’s cigarettes—Camel Turkish Royal.
See some fuckin’ walkie talkie looking thing in the maintenance breakr...
In my heart—for lack of a better word—I ducked. Head down, I slipped past the pharmacy, skirted the cafe, and swung behind a display counter illuminating, of a...
Alessandro DiFrancesco, despite their name, is almost painfully American. When they read a character of Kurt Vonnegut’s description of the failed sci-fi author ...
The pragmatic businessman is always composed: abundant hair fixed in a quaff, gym-fit form clothed in cognac oxfords and a charcoal puppytooth suit, decisions m...
The sky is bleeding rain. I am on 42nd Street and I cannot tell if I am wet or just cold. The sun is MIA.
Across from me is this mime making O shapes with hi...
Lately I’ve been burning down highways blindfolded. There are only three ways out of town: east, west, south. He sits in the passenger seat and keeps ...
The Holy Snail has been making waves again. Though to be fair, when has it ever not? One might be excused for thinking this creature’s exalted name has somethin...
Waiting for the 6 train at Union Square, normally a hurricane of activity, dead at four in the morning. Cory worked the night shift at The Inn in Gramercy Park,...
Inspired by an exercise her therapist gave her, Thea goes to estate sales to buy fine china to smash. Small plates rimmed in gold, porcelain tea cups once gripp...
So much noise buffeting around in here I can’t make sense of it. I focus on the crackling paper of my cigarette. Through all the rest I can still hear that, but...
God gave me my money.
—John D. Rockefeller
My luck with money reached its end at the Field Museum. Joan covered my entry fee, swore she didn’t mind....
The specialest movie was one we’d watch during sleepovers— we being all the kids who’d ditch our homes every night to be in each other’s, a dozen of us, in four...