After the films “Cult of the Sun” and “Hereditary”

 

Why isn’t your own darkness enough, Paimon?

You point your fingers at me, your followers weave

A crown of herbs. You guide my fingers,

I crown myself.

 

Mythic time, blurred boundaries, black sun

Is at its highest point. But if I didn’t have

My own history, there would be nothing. This vulnerability –

An open fracture of the largest bone, a muscle tear

Through which the cock’s blood, the goat’s bleat, seeps.

 

I love the most fatal roles.

 

Tell me, why do I always cringe at the tribe of villains?

What is it about the bodies of volunteers flying off a cliff that fascinates me?

The dripping wrists, the oppressive exaltation, the vertigo syndrome?

 

Why do I keep watching those horror films about possession?

To surrender or to resist? With whom I debate, when nothing can repel

the all-encompassing corduroy of the sky?

 

O Lord, sometimes Your dominion gives me a pleasant shiver.

For at last I can give in and let my fingers do the tapping

The formlessness of the night, to open the wounds again and again, so that

I relish my third death, Your sixth coming.