In memory of my teenage hero
When my son and I watch the anime “One-Punch Man”, I always think of
Chuck Norris. All those jokes about the invincible Texas Ranger,
who defeats my acne-ridden adolescence with a single Tangsudo move.
Glued to the screen, I’d snicker into my hands, but I still believed
that there were stronger heroes who protect us from braces,
sagging pantyhose and not knowing how to French kiss.
The boys in my class wanted to French kiss.
C. J. Parker taught them that during nights of wet dreams.
I still read old Chuck Norris jokes online.
My faith in martial arts faltered when my teenage hero
couldn’t avoid the visit of the handsome young Joe Black.
And my son and I are still waiting for the new season of “One-Punch Man.”
I already know how to French kiss. But I still believe in the masterful moves of Tangsudo,
which protect against sagging jaws, incontinence, a double chin, and unexpected guests.
I wonder what the boys in my class are thinking while watching the movie “The Last Showgirl?”